10 Reasons Valentines Day Sucks plus Top Anti-Love Songs
February 14th, 2008 by KarenToday is finally Valentine’s Day—which means it’s almost over!
Thank goodness.
Couples can stop wasting money on candy hearts and flowers, and singles can stop explaining why it’s ok to be single on this Hallmark holiday.
Of course, Easter is just around the corner, so you might have to buy your sweetie a stuffed bunny and some chocolate eggs or marshmallow peeps—but after that you’re safe from the holidays for a while…Well, unless you have some odd ritual for the 4th of July.
10 Reasons Valentine’s Day Sucks
10. Cupid
Chubby naked baby flying around shooting people with love arrows? No thanks, creepy.
9. Bad poetry
Oh, you found a Rumi book at Barnes and Noble. Yeah, so did everybody else.
8. Cheesy greeting cards
Drawing a picture of a heart on a Post It note is much sweeter than most of these lame-o photos of flowers and those creepy little cupids. Even your grandma knows how dorky this stuff is.
7. Sympathy for singles
There’s nothing wrong with being single, but you wouldn’t know it in February.
6. Roses
Bringing home flowers “just because” says, “I love you.”
Bringing home flowers on Valentine’s Day says, “I just spent a ton of cash on these stupid flowers. I hope you’re happy. And please tell your mom I did something nice.”
5. Fancy Dinner
See explanation above.
4. Get out your wallet.
Between the flowers, candy, dinner and gifts, this day can get pretty expensive. However, while TV commercials want you to believe that girls all want expensive gifts and trinkets, the truth is, most of them would rather have a quiet/normal night at home and get a sweet love note (no, email doesn’t count). A recent story on Yahoo! Reported that we spend an average of $17 billion on this, er, holiday (that comes out to about $123 per person).
3. Candy Hearts
Even kids won’t eat these chalky rocks—and kids will eat sugar out of a bag if you let them.
2. Gross Chocolate
Chocolate is very yummy. Period. Yet, for some reason, at Valentine’s Day the chocolate makers of the world unite to stuff otherwise decent chocolate with all kinds of gross filling—from orange and raspberry to the always mysterious nougat.
1. Lame love songs.
Seriously, does anybody really want to hear Celine Dion or Whitney Houston ever again? No. A thousand times, no.
Suggested Anti-Valentine’s Day Music:
“I Hate Myself for Loving You”—Joan Jett
“Love Bites”—Def Leppard
“Love Hurts”—Nazareth
“Hate That I Love You”—Rihanna
Valentine’s Day: Love it or hate it?
Leave a comment and let us know!
