Above: Bono embarrasses himself, and Elvis, though bad poetry, slurs and insults.
After the jump: Read Bono’s entire poem.

It seems that even Bono’s friends in the British media are having trouble defending his newly-broadcast poem about Elvis. The 14 minute ordeal finds the U2 frontman dusting off an epic list of facts, fictions, slurs and back-handed compliments targeted at the reigning King of Rock’n'Roll.

Throughout the poem, Bono manages to call Elvis everything from a saint and sinner to a nigger, hillbilly and fat.

If this is how he speaks of his idols, what does Bono say about his enemies?

After over a decade on the shelf, BBC saw fit to broadcast this self-indulgent nonsense as part of the kick-off for poetry season. Poetry season? Sure, why not.

Bono’s rambling mess was previously trimmed and made into the song “Elvis Presley and America,” which appears on 1984’s The Unforgettable Fire. That song is plenty horrible, but the unabridged poem titled Elvis: American David is even worse.

Sample:

Elvis
drove a truck

Elvis
had a monkey named bubbles before anyone

Elvis
wore eye make up, just hangin’ out

Elvis
the white nigger
ate at burger king
and just kept getting bigger
 
We expect so little from Bono, and yet he still manages to disappoint.

Good job.

Keep reading for the whole 800+ word catastrophe…it gets worse. Continue reading »