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How to Be on TV, with Coldplay

Published October 21st, 2009 by Karen

photo credit: stigeredoo

In honor of the 20^th anniversary of the Simpsons, the show’s creators are calling upon fans to submit suggestions/designs for a new character that will appear in an upcoming episode set to feature Sgt. Pepper-loving Brit piano-rock types, Coldplay (no word on whether singer Chris Martin’s wife/blogger Gwyneth Paltrow will be in tow).

Coldplay joins a long list of musical guests who’ve appeared on the show in cartoon form, including the Ramones, Paul McCartney, the White Stripes, Rolling Stones, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Blink 182 and many more.

The Simpsons’ website says the contest is being held because the writers are “tired and, frankly, too rich to care anymore.”

They think it’s a joke, but we’re not so sure. We think this contest is being held because the show is out of ideas and the lame-o writers know it.

(Seriously, when is this show going to start being awesome again?)

Regardless of the reason, designing a cartoon character is probably a lot more fun that whatever else you’ve been working on today, so why not give it a shot?

Complete details on submitting your Simpsons character Continue reading »

"yeah it is surprising."

muslim baby names

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American Idol Star Welcomes Baby. The Surprising Name?

Published August 11th, 2009 by Karen

ABOVE: Jennifer Hudson performs “Will You Be There” during the public memorial service and concert held for Michael Jackson in July.

Oscar-winning American Idol cast-off/Dreamgirls star Jennifer Hudson welcomed her first child Monday evening, according to post on her official website.

The happy news of the birth of 27-year-old Hudson’s healthy baby boy comes after a year filled with tragedy: Hudson’s mother, brother, and young nephew were murdered in October (a fact she’d probably rather not be reminded of every time someone mentions the birth of her new baby…).

Hudson, engaged to Harvard Law Grad/ex-I Love New York 2 contestant David Otunga chose to give her baby a surprising name: Continue reading »

"That's so sweet of them. Rape us while the economy is good and then give $1 last minute tickets to people. Bono, you really do understand the little..."

Wastedyrs

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Recession Sends Big Concerts Under $10: U2, Jonas Brothers

Published August 1st, 2009 by Wendy

ABOVE: U2 with big hair in the ’80s. Just one of the bands being hit by the recession.

If there’s any silver lining to the current recession it’s on the musical front, where last-minute tickets to hear big acts like Coldplay and Bruce Springsteen are available for as little as $1, according to a Reuters report.

According to the report, eBay Inc’s StubHub, the leading Internet ticket re-seller, has confirmed that last-minute concert ticket sales at sharply lower prices are on the rise for acts like Paul McCartney, Springsteen, Jonas Brothers, Coldplay, and U2.

“People often assume a secondary ticket site only offers inflated prices, but it’s very challenging right now,” Sean Pate, a spokesman for San Francisco-based StubHub, was quoted as saying. He said cheap prices were not showing up just for “nosebleed” seats or lawn seats, but rather in all seat locations for top performers.

Many of the big tours are reportedly sold out through vendors like Live Nation, but a certain percentage of tickets find their way onto the secondary market on sites like StubHub or craigslist.org. Given the economy, many of these tickets are being sold by a combination of ticket brokers and regular fans at steep discounts

"I owe my genital herpes to you Dean Westlake."

Dean Westlake

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Bono’s Elvis Poem a Mess of Racial Slurs, Insults

Published May 14th, 2009 by Karen

Above: Bono embarrasses himself, and Elvis, though bad poetry, slurs and insults.
After the jump: Read Bono’s entire poem.

It seems that even Bono’s friends in the British media are having trouble defending his newly-broadcast poem about Elvis. The 14 minute ordeal finds the U2 frontman dusting off an epic list of facts, fictions, slurs and back-handed compliments targeted at the reigning King of Rock’n'Roll.

Throughout the poem, Bono manages to call Elvis everything from a saint and sinner to a nigger, hillbilly and fat.

If this is how he speaks of his idols, what does Bono say about his enemies?

After over a decade on the shelf, BBC saw fit to broadcast this self-indulgent nonsense as part of the kick-off for poetry season. Poetry season? Sure, why not.

Bono’s rambling mess was previously trimmed and made into the song “Elvis Presley and America,” which appears on 1984’s The Unforgettable Fire. That song is plenty horrible, but the unabridged poem titled Elvis: American David is even worse.

Sample:

Elvis
drove a truck

Elvis
had a monkey named bubbles before anyone

Elvis
wore eye make up, just hangin’ out

Elvis
the white nigger
ate at burger king
and just kept getting bigger

We expect so little from Bono, and yet he still manages to disappoint.

Good job.

Keep reading for the whole 800+ word catastrophe…it gets worse. Continue reading »

"Actually, if you know anything about U2, that 'poem' is actually the lyrics of a very old U2 song..."

Acrobat

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Bonotheism and Bono’s Elvis Poem Blur Line Between Reality, the Onion

Published May 11th, 2009 by Karen

Above: If U2’s nightmarish “Get On Your Boots” didn’t scare you away from the radio, Bono is hitting the airwaves with something even more frightening…

Once again, reality and the Onion have come too close for comfort.

Last week it was reported that U2 leader Bono will be the subject of a CNN program dubbed Bonotheism during which Bono, “illuminates the path to righteousness in [a] new weekly program…” intertwining music and theology.

Last week it was also reported that Bono will take to the airwaves to read a 10-year-old poem he wrote about Elvis.

So which one of these stories is true? Continue reading »

"No Coldplay is just talentless and without ethics, Ms. Fisher commented on this board to the effect that it isnt that big of a deal to steal someone..."

Rick Summer

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Coldplay Plagiarism Suit Grows to Four Bands, See Video Comparison

Published May 6th, 2009 by Karen

Above: A handy video compares Coldplay’s “Viva la Vida” with similar songs by Joe Satriani, Cat Stevens and Enanitos Verdes. Class action lawsuit, anyone?

Folk singer Cat Stevens (now calling himself Yusuf Islam, but everyone else still calls him Cat Stevens) is apparently considering jumping on the bandwagon and suing Coldplay over its song “Viva La Vida” and the supposed plagiarism of his 1973 song “Foreigner Suite.”

Now, we really don’t want to defend Coldplay’s blandly affable pop, but we don’t think Stevens has a case. And, if he does have a case, he should actually be suing guitarist Joe Satriani, since Satriani thinks Coldplay stole the song from his “If I Could Fly”—which means Satriani must’ve copied it from Stevens, right?

Frankly, we’re not sure why anyone would want to claim credit for this boring mess.
Oh wait, it involves a stack of cash as big as Gwyneth Paltrow’s ego, that’s why.

Maybe, the song’s chord progression is just so common and natural (and kinda boring) that it has already been played a million times before, so nobody can really claim ownership of it anymore-like a blues riff.

Long before Satriani’s case made headlines, Brooklyn’s bouncy pop act Creaky Boards (AKA Andrew Hoepfner) claimed that Coldplay had stolen the “Viva la Vida” melody from its song (fittingly titled “The Songs I Didn’t Write”) after seeing the band perform at the CMJ music festival in 2007. Hoepfner hasn’t filed charges, and we’re not really sure if this is a joke or not, but it’s still more convincing than the Satriani case.

After the jump: See the actually pretty convincing Coldplay vs. Brooklyn’s Creaky Boards comparison video. Continue reading »

"Ha! Right on... Cat should sue Satriani like the Music Vixen says."

Jason

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Did Coldplay Steal Cat Stevens Song?

Published May 5th, 2009 by Wendy

photo credit: fibercool

Singer-songwriter Cat Stevens agreed yesterday that the Coldplay song, “Viva La Vida,” sounds like one of his 1973 songs, but he did not say he would sue the British band for plagiarism, according to a Reuters report.

“My son brought it to my attention and said: ‘Doesn’t that sound like ‘Foreigner Suite?’” Stevens, now known as Yusuf Islam, told Reuters. The song definitely sounds like it,” he said of his song. “It has such logical chords and the melody has to be what it is…”

Islam said he still might sue Coldplay, depending upon how the Joe Satriani suit turns out. The American guitarist has sued Coldplay, accusing the British band of copyright infringement and claiming that substantial original portions of his song “If I Could Fly” are recycled in “Viva La Vida.” Satriani is seeking damages

Islam has recently come out with a new album called “Roadsinger,” which he will soon be plugging on a visit to the U.S.

"haha, giving away cds by a different band would be a funny idea...they probably have bad taste in music though."

Karen

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Free Coldplay CD Giveaway, 2009 Coldplay Tour Dates, Tracklist

Published May 1st, 2009 by Karen

Above: Coldplay fans demonstrate the “coldwave.” We miss Zippos.

We’ll admit that Coldplay isn’t necessarily our favorite band (ahem), but we do admire the fact that the group is making an effort to give something back to its fans.

An announcement posted on the band’s website indicates that Coldplay will give away free CDs to at its 2009 concerts. The free disc, LeftRightLeftRightLeft, is a collection of live versions of some of the band’s songs.

LeftRightLeftRightLeft tracklist
1. Glass of Water
2. 42
3. Clocks
4. Strawberry Swing
5. The Hardest Part/Postcards From Far Away
6. Viva La Vida
7. Death Will Never Conquer
8. Fix You
9. Death And All His Friends

For fans not able to fork over the $50+ dollars for concert tickets, the band hasn’t forgotten you: the disc will be available as a free download beginning May 15.

Wanna see Coldplay in concert?
2009 Coldplay Tour Dates, after the jump. Continue reading »

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Bamboozle Fest 2009: No Doubt, Cover Bands, Third Eye Blind Reunion (?)

Published May 1st, 2009 by Karen

This weekend, New Jersey is going to be filled with even more, um, unusual folks than usual as the Bamboozle Festival rolls into town and lures all the emo kids out of their bedroom-mope-caves for a weekend of unnecessary reunions and pop-punk cover bands. Um, sweet?

Expect a weekend of bad haircuts and worse music. Sorry, dorks.

Among the bigger names on this year’s bill are Third Eye Blind (seriously?!), No Doubt (newly reunited, for some reason), Fall Out Boy (insert your own Bronx Mowgli joke, here), Asher Roth, Taking Back Sunday, and the Maine (owners of the worst emo haircuts in recent memory).

No Doubt is headlining the fest, but Gwen Stefani’s hubby, Gavin Rossdale, isn’t quite as lucky these days. He’s relegated to playing after Bloodhound Gang on Saturday afternoon.

On the plus side, at least Gwar (who claim to be aliens from Antarctica sent to rule the earth, or something like that) will be there, rocking their homemade costumes and fake blood. (Remember when Gwar was on on Jerry Springer?)

If that’s not bad enough, the day before Bamboozle, NJ is hosting the Hoodwink Fest-a festival of cover bands featuring bands you’ve probably never heard of doing songs by bands they should probably just leave alone.

Boys Like Girls will play Coldplay songs.
Anti-Flag plays the Clash
Sum 41 plays Metallica
And so on.

Some lesser-known bands are playing Avril LaVigne and Britney Spears. Wow, pop-punk bands doing lame pop songs. Um, is this funny anymore?

Full line-up, at the Hoodwink Fest page.

Complete 2009 Bamboozle Fest line-up, after the jump. Continue reading »

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2009 Chickenfoot Tour Dates, mp3s: Hagar, Satriani a “Supergroup”?

Published April 24th, 2009 by Karen

This might be the most annoying promo video ever made. It’s for a band called Chickenfoot.

Have you heard of Chickenfoot?

Chickenfoot is being billed as a new “supergroup” featuring ex-Van Halen singer Sammy Hagar, ex-VH bassist Michael Anthony, Red Hot Chili Peppers drummer Chad Smith and guitarist-who-sued-Coldplay-for-plagiarism, Joe Satriani.

A guy who couldn’t upstage David Lee Roth and a guy so boring Coldplay might’ve swiped his song? Um, thanks…

As expected, Chickenfoot basically sounds like a middle-aged Van Halen cover band. The group’s self-titled debut album hits stores in June, if you’re curious, you can check out three free Chickenfoot mp3s.

Complete Chickenfoot 2009 Tour Dates (after the jump) Continue reading »